Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Standard Transmissions

It has come to my attention that it is sad that I don't know how to drive a standard vehicle.

I have had 3 standard transmission driving lessons in my life.

The first lesson I received was from my dad. He had a Ford F250 Diesel. It was a beast. I believe I was 13 years old and I drove that man around the farm all day. I mastered it that day...but I never did it again.

The second lesson was from my sister. This adventure was in Toyota Tacoma. This experience was not so successful.

The latest lesson came last night.
I returned home yesterday afternoon from a long day at work. All I wanted to do was crash. I was so exhausted but Jimmy was waiting on me. I walked through the door and was informed that we were having driving lessons. He loaded an ice chest with beer for himself...of course, he backed the truck in so I wouldn't have to begin my driving in reverse and he was ready to go.

So I hopped in the truck. He told me to start it up. So I pushed in the clutch and started the case you were wondering it's a GMC Sierra K2500 HD...Jimmy forgot to tell me to push the the very first thing I did was hit him. I almost ran over him. Most people would call the driving lesson off right then and there...but not Jimmy!

So we get out of the driveway, (after I dumped the clutch a few times) and I make it to my first stop sign. Well of course there is a car behind me. Bless their hearts. They had to sit behind me why the truck kept dying. And of course this happened at every stop sign.

But finally we got to the farm and played the stop/go game for a while. I continued to dump the clutch and take my aggression out on the shifter.

After about 2 hours of driving around the country I was feeling pretty confident about my driving abilities. So we decided to head home. Of course we go to HWY 64 (this is the main hwy that runs through Augusta). In order to get on HWY 64 you have to go up a slight incline. Well there are big trucks flying by, a car behind me (of course) and I completely freak out. All of my lesson has left me. I completely forgot what to do. All I can envision is turning onto 64 and the truck dying and Jimmy and being smashed by oncoming traffic. I became a little hysterical.

Needless to say...we made it! He said that my next lesson will be learning to start on an incline. This should be interesting. I will definitely keep you posted!

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Things I Don't Understand and Things That Annoy Me

Ok I have been thinking a lot about things that just don't make sense to me. I have started compiling a mental list and now I feel like I have a good enough list to share. So here it goes:

1. Why do people feel the need to forward you emails that say if you don't send this to 10 people you will: have bad luck, die, lose the love of your life, never find the love of your life, be miserable forever, not go to heaven, etc. Are you kidding me? Really?

2. Why do people feel it's necessary to sit at a yellow light?

3. Why does traffic get bottle necked when there is no apparent reason. Does someone just decide to stop in the middle of the road, hold up traffic for a little bit and then go? Just curious...

4. Why do people have to be one uppers. No one likes these people...they just irritate the hell out of everyone they are around...but the worst part one ever tells them to stop! Why do we put up with it. We all have friends/acquaintances that do it. Why do we not point out their annoying habit and force them to stop.

5. Nuevo Riche people! What is their problem?

6. Waiting at the Doctor's office. Why do you even schedule an appointment? What's the point?

7. People who refuse to take the blame. Why? Everyone else knows it's your's time for you to admit it.

8. Why is it that when someone says they are afraid of something...such as a snake...the first time you are around a snake with a person who knows your fear do they feel the need to chase you with the snake? Who does that? What is wrong with people.

9. Middle aged men who think they are God's gift to women. The ones who have been divorced twice, had multiple ex girlfriends (who hate them by the way) and still believe that it is the women's fault. I believe that it's time to look in the mirror and realize that maybe, just maybe it's you.

10. Telemarketers...Really...Who wants that job?? Do you think that the telemarketer on the other end of the phone loves their job? Who decides to do that as a career? I don't get it.

11. Why is every customer service agency overseas? I always feel bad asking them to repeat what they are saying...but I can't understand them. It's so obnoxious!

12. Why don't men understand that gossiping is a necessity. Women can't help is built in our DNA. We also don't consider it gossip...we consider it fact finding. And yes we realize that even though what someone says or does doesn't always directly effect our lives...we still feel the need to discuss and analyze. This is what we do! Deal with it!

13. Why is that sometimes you can drink a bottle of wine and feel the need for another, but there are other times when a glass will make all the difference in the world.

Just curious??

Friday, September 26, 2008

Flowers, Dogs, and Vomit...Oh MY!

I had absolutely the best day yesterday! Everything was the same as usual until after lunch. I was outside of work and the Artistic Florist Van drove by and I thought to myself...I wish they were delivering something to me...and they were!! Jimmy, the greatest hubby in the world, sent me flowers just because.

Actually, there is a story behind the flowers. We always have Monday Night Football at our house. This past Monday, Jimmy was suppose to clean the shop up so Amy H. could cook...he forgot to clean. He went and played golf. So of course being the loving wife I called him and informed him that the shop was disgusting and needed to be cleaned. He of course had to finish his golf game.
I decided to get brave. Lesley and I found some rubber gloves and decided to clean...did I mention there were week old chicken bones hanging out with their new friends The Maggots! SICK SICK SICK!! I think I screamed. Needless to say, it was disgusting! Luckily Lesley was there to help and then Amy H. helped too! They are some troopers. They deserved flowers more that I did!

I also have another reason I love him dearly. We have a dog named Leroy who is precious, most of the time. Ohhh...I have to tell this story first...then I will finish the first story...This morning I was on the phone with my mom and Leroy escaped out the back door. So of course I started yelling at him to get back in the house...this is what I said "Leroy, GET back in the house? DO you hear me?" Ok ...Add my southern accent and frustration and I sounded like I walked right out of the trailer park. I started laughing of course. My poor mother...I know she was wondering about what the hell happened to me.

Ok...Back to Pageants...

Leroy my precious dog loves to chew on leather. Well yesterday he decided to eat leather. Dogs cannot digest leather. They throw it up! I don't do throw up! Jimmy...God love him...cleaned it up. He scrubbed the carpet and everything. When everything was done he told me it was all clear and that I could go back in the living room. Heaven help me if/when we have kids. I don't know what I will do.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Take a Hike Ike

Ok!! I am definitely not in love with Hurricane Ike. He canceled my weekend plans. I realize on the grand scheme of things this is the least of the worries of Hurricane Ike...but it is still annoying. We were suppose to go to Austin this weekend and watch the Razorbacks attempt to beat Texas. I was more excited about going to my sisters and hanging out with her. I am not sad however that we are missing the drive down there.

I don't how many of you have ever driven from Arkansas to Austin...but it sucks! We were going to take our most fabulous conversion van so at least we would have been comfortable! For those of you who have never ridden in the conversion's great! We have figured out that you can fit 14 people and 2 big ice chests in a conversion van and have one great party!

So now I get to make new plans. I do know for a fact that we are going to T-Berry's (Augusta's local bar) for their grand re-opening on Saturday night. There is another new owner with big dreams. He wants to make the bar a two story bar with a country dance floor upstairs and a rock/rap dance floor downstairs. The Augusta bar scene is getting fancy!! Well kinda...they did spray paint the front of the building...instead of buying a new sign...It's awesome! But I do plan on having a few cocktails and probably I'm going to do a little dancing.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Lovely Weather We're Having

I am so in love with the weather! It has been perfect outside the past few days. I cannot believe it is the end of August and it is perfect outside. These are the type of days that are best enjoyed outside. I have been thinking about being in Fayetteville and how on a day like this we would have gone to US Pizza, Jose's, or anywhere that had a patio and ordered a pitcher of beer/margaritas and spent the rest of the afternoon drinking, talking, and loving the weather. I miss these carefree days. It is so hard to sit in an office and just look outside. I have decided that when the weather is this should be declared inclement weather. Why do we only get to miss work/school when the weather is bad? I just keep thinking of all the things I would rather be doing.

Here is my list:

1. Go to the River

2. Sit on a patio, listen to live music, and drink a nice cold beverage.

3. Go Ranger Riding (Rachel/Kristan I know you remember)

4. Sit on a breezeway and play drinking games

5. Go to the River

6. Have a BBQ

The list could go on.

I just think it is unfair to be stuck inside! I hope that the weather will stay like this through Labor Day. I feel the river calling my name.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Dinner Partners

Last night Jimmy and I celebrated our very First Anniversary! Yeah to us! We decided to go eat at Shoguns Japanesse Steakhouse in Little Rock. As you all eat with strangers. Jimmy and I were placed with a very elegant older lady and her two grandsons...Andrew who was 4 and Malcom who was 6. I know you are wondering why I know their names...well...the poor Grandmother said them so much it was hard to forget. Bless her heart...she never raised her voice...but I believe she said "Now Malcom, Now Andrew" at least 42 times. Andrew was the most active one. He took an instant liking to Jimmy. He waved a peppermint in front of his face and jumped around/on him for the first 10 minutes or so. Then he preceded to pick up his chopsticks and try to stick them in Jimmy's ear or on his face or on his plate. It was hilarious!! Jimmy informed me that when we had kids...that would never happen. Andrew made up for his bad behavior in the end however, he kept picking up the food he didn't like and placing it on Jimmys plate. We enjoyed ourselves however! We then went back to our condo in LR and enjoyed some cocktails on the back deck. It was the perfect ending to a great day!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Happy Anniversary To Me!!

This is my first post! My most fabulous friend Rachel convinced me I would not be silly to start here it goes! Today is my First Anniversary! A year ago today we got married at the Don Cesar in St. Pete Beach Florida! I have to admit it was the most beautiful beautiful. I am the genius that decided to get married in August in Florida! Yeah me! But now that a year has gone by I have a few tips on how to have a successful first year.

Here they go:
1. Don't expect perfection. I never realized how messy we were, how many clothes had to be washed, and how eating dinner at 10 o'clock sometimes just happens.
2. Just because you know you got married, other people tend to forget. Sometimes people stop by unannounced and ruin your perfect quiet evening. Enjoy it!! Someday people may stop coming by!
3. Fight fair! Never bring things up that happened 6 months ago...your husband does not remember.
4. If you want something...come out and ask...Jimmy taught me this one! I like to beat around the bush about things...then I end up now I just tell it like it is.
5. When someone asks what's wrong....never ever ever ever say nothing! It just makes it worse.
6. Don't let anyone tell you how it is suppose to be. They don't live your life and you don't live theirs.
7. Listen to each other.
8. Laugh a lot.
9. It's ok to go to bed mad...Just say I love you before you go to sleep...Sometimes you are not ready to duke it out...and most of the time you feel better about it the next day.
10. Enjoy every minute you get to spend with each other!!!